Moving Out!

At the end of the month, we're moving (fingers crossed). Things have gone very quickly these past 3 days but tonight we sold Greenspond Dr. and are bracing ourselves for the reno ahead of us at Empire Ave. Unnerved by the inspection report and in love with the location and the backyard (1/2 acre backing on Rennie's River) we are optimistic that the reno gods will be with us.

I worry about Ben & FG though. I know they will be very happy to spend a week (or three) with Nana & Poppy in the Junction while we demolish the basement, put in a kitchen and bathroom. But I want them to have a safe, clean house to come back to. ie. running water, electricity, kitchen. Funny, though. They will be the ones who will likely mind the least if we slept in a tent all summer.

Bottomed Out

We’ve started a new stage in this parenting adventure.

As of this week, we’re officially at the part where Ben tests his limits. We’re at the part where I say, “Ok, 5 minutes to bed time” “Don’t throw it or you’ll go to your room” “Just one show after supper” and he runs away and throw it; or worse – he pushes me and turns the TV back on.

With PL in Toronto, I admit last night I lost my patience.

After a long evening of supper hour battles (“Just one mouthful of rice!”) and 2 time outs – I was done! I picked him up (not easy now that he’s nearly 4 and 45 lbs), carried him up the stairs and straight to bed. He kicked. He screamed. He woke FG. I said, “I’ll slap your bottom.” He kicked and screamed and I did it. I slapped his bottom – one straight flat hand tap -- and I walked out.

I calmly went into the bathroom, brushed my teeth put on my pajamas and looked at myself in the mirror. My head was buzzing. I was sad, angry and exhausted all at the same time. I cried a little and then I heard his voice.

“Mama, Are you there?”

I went in his room and without saying a word he sobbed: “I’m sorry. Mama I didn’t listen to you. I’m sorry now.” I hugged him back and wiped his tears.

“Why are your eyes red, Mama?”

I didn’t tell him I was crying too.

It Takes a Village

We put an ad in the paper: Wanted Loving, Energetic Nanny to care for a vibrant 20-month-old boy. Must love walks in the park, Dr. Seuss, and afternoon snacks. That’s how Brenda found us.

2 ½ years (and 1 Frances Grace) later, she has done more than prepare afternoon snacks. She has taken care of our children. They have gone to the Lieutenant-Governor’s Tea Party, visited the seals in Logy Bay and ridden on the Double Decker Bus. She plays basketball, restaurant and makes a mean wacky mac with butter.

For a mom, going back to work is never easy. But Brenda was always there to come early, stay late; cuddle children; keep the house tidy and me sane.
Today, we made the hard decision to put both Ben & Frances Grace in Grands Vents daycare full-time on the 1st of June. Right now, I’m not sure what life will be like without her. There’s an old saying, “It takes a village to raise a child.” I think it just takes Brenda. I’ll miss her.

Crazy for Crocs

There's a great 22 Minutes sketch called Dorks. Maybe so, but my guys love these!

Ode to a Slow Cooker

Thou still unravish'd bowl of casseroles,
Thou foster-child of leftovers and slow Time,
Culinary great, who canst thus express
A savory tale more sweetly than our thyme:
What lentil-borne legend haunts about thy shape
Of carrots or potatoes, or of broth,
In my Kitchen or the cuisine de Bisaillon?
What hungry husbands or youngsters are these? What working moms would not get a meal on the table without you?
What mad gastronomic pursuit? What steam struggles to escape?
What pots and pan? What wild ecstasy?

Dinner is served - with apologies to John Keats.

SLOG Remakes

Hate is a really strong word. I use it sparingly. Except when I’m talking about music remakes.

I hate remakes. With a passion. On the rare occassion, one or two float to the top; sounding crisper, clearer than the original. When they do, I put these on my SLOG - Short List of Good Remakes:

Sexy Back
Original: Justin Timberlake
Remake: Rock Plaza Central

Good Morning Starshine
Original: Raspberry Alarm Clock
Remake: Serena Ryder

Landslide
Original: Fleetwood Mac
Remake: Dixie Chicks

Lovers In a Dangerous Time
Original: Bruce Cockburn
Remake: Barenaked Ladies

Inside and Out
Original: Bee Gees
Remake: Feist

Easter Egg Hunt

Looking for an alternative to hiding eggs? Every year we hide plastic eggs filled with riddles

eg.
I'm a place to bake and a place to cook
Come in the kitchen and take a look

FG & Me, Easter 2006

That takes them to the stove where they find the next riddle. It all leads to a little chocolate and a present. Very Blue's Clues/Dora. Last year Ben got a toy skateboard and FG got a rag doll. Simple a (nearly) sugar-free.

Favourite (and Not So) Favourite Things

When Benjo was just 3 months old, my brain was brimming with things I had learned as truths by the 4th trimester. Yesterday, I found an email I had sent out to a friend with my favourite and not so favourite things. Funny, not much has changed. Since those first days can be so overwhelming, I thought I'd post that email here. Here it is:
Hi Friend, Here are a list of some things that Pierre-Luc and found that made our first few months a little easier and some things we never needed so much. Who knows? You may or may not find the same works for you. But as you surely know by now, being pregnant and being a mom is an open call for advice! The best I was given after we came home with Ben was simple: "Why stand when you can sit? Why sit when you can lie down? Why lie down when you can sleep?"

Anyway, here's the shopping list in no particular order:

Breastfeeding: If you decide to breastfeed, get yourself a couple of good nursing bras and some breast pads because in the first few days while your milk is coming in, you'll leak like crazy (this might be too much information, but get yourself a mattress cover if you don't already have one). After that, things regulate themselves out with the "supply and demand" ;) For a pump, I use the AVENT system. Most everyone says its the best one. All the bottles fit the pump and when you're ready, you can change the nipple on the bottle for a sippy cup. Saves you from buying a whack of stuff you don't need. Others, however, swear by the electric pump which you can rent from the hospital or from a drug store. My opinion on this is use whatever works for you. I didn't use a breastfeeding pillow because my torso's so short. I tried one and it didn't work for me, but you might want to check one out.

Receiving Blankets and other Linens: People generally give you a lot of this stuff but have plenty (i.e. 10-12) on hand to start. You'll be surprised how many you'll go through in the first few weeks. Down the road when you're little person starts to move a lot in the crib, you might want to consider an infant sleeping bag. This is like a little bunting bag to sleep in where there arms stick out. It prevents them from kicking off all their blankets when they get out of the "swaddle me" stage. I picked mine up at Diaper-Eze (address below) but I'm sure you can get it at baby stores out your way.

Clothes: It has only been in the last month that Benjamin has been wearing real clothes. Before that it was sleepers and those little T-Shirts that snap on the bottom. Baby Bjorn: We really like this. It's likely the $$ of the carriers but Ben really enjoys it and now that he's older and can face outward its fun to use on Saturday's when the sidewalks are busy and too crowded for a stroller. The only down side is - as he gets heavier they become less comfortable. Since you're little peanut is coming in the Fall/Winter - you might pass on this and look to one of those Mountain Equipment Co-op backpacks to use in the spring. A friend of mine has one and loves it. Some people also swear by the slings. Ben never much cared for this but others love it.

Stroller Accessories: I have a few things I really like. It'll depend on how much you will use your stroller. I have the Jolly Jumper Plastic Weather Guard ($15-ish @ Zellers/Walmart) and the UV Screen. Both are pretty awesome.

Bath Tub: Never really used ours much past the first month. Now, PL baths with Benjamin. It's great Dad and Son time and it gives Ben more room to splash around.

Bassinets, Cribs, Pack & Plays: I think from what you said today, your nursery is all set. That's awesome (I believe we were doing our after Ben was home since we only moved in 2 weeks before my due date!). A couple of things on sleeping arrangements. Because his nursery was on the 2nd floor and our bedroom on the 3rd (and because the little people like tighter sleeping quarters), Ben slept in a bassinet in our room for the first few month of so. This made nursing in the night a lot easier. If you want/need a bassinet, feel free to come by and borrow ours. Seriously. We're not using it. If the nursery is close by, don't bother with one. Pack and Plays (those travel cribs) are also great. We have a Graco one. They are heavy as old hell to lug around but very convenient if you plan on visiting. Boy, gone are the days of our parents when they put the baby in the box the radio came in.

A Comfortable Nursing Chair for Mom: Of all the things you can do without, this isn't one of them. While nursing will get easier (I know, it will not feel like it on Day 2-3, but TRUST me on this one, it will) you should get a really comfy chair because you'll be spending a ton of time in it!! I didn't get a fancy rocker or anything although those are neat. Instead, I bought one of those Piong Chairs from IKEA (you know the ones that they have on display being tested this the machine pressing against it the back).

Bouncy Chair for Baby: Or as we call if in our house, the "Magic Chair" ("Chaise Magique" en francais). There's a number of different models that vibrate. We have the Kick & Play from Fisher Price, but there are others that will also do the trick. For a few weeks, this was the only way I could eat breakfast or PL and I could eat dinner. Now, he likes to sit in it and watch me unload the dishwasher.

Monitors: you likely already have one. But just in case, we really like the Fisher Price Sounds & Lights. Sometimes we do pick up our neighbour's baby on it (they have the same monitor) but for the most part we like it.

Blinds: Underneath Benjamin's beautiful roman blinds we installed those old fashioned roller blinds to block out all the light. It really helped in the summer to put him down for naps.

Diapers: Not sure if your going cloth or disposable but if you're considering disposable, check out www.smallplanetinc.com. They are a recycling program for disposable diapers. Several of us in the neighbourhood use them.

CDs: WARNING: There is a ton of really cheesy children's CDs out there. And while its not a priority to run out and get any (Tell your husband to start singing - Benjamin prefers that over anything), we have found a few that he enjoys and we can tolerate.

Check out Amazon for:
Golden Slumbers: A Father's Lullaby
For The Kids
Also, Play Time: Pottery Barn Kids Jazz CD is pretty good.

Ocean Wonders Aquarium: This thing is something else. I'm sure you've heard all the theories about hushing sounds and waves to soothe a baby, well this thing (you can see it on the Fisher Price site) is something else. Benjamin really enjoys it. The wave sounds and bubbling water can send him right to sleep in a few minutes. A great suggestion for a gift if the in-laws are asking!

Mobile: Benjamin also loves his mobile and his Gym. These are great, particularly when he could start to see things better and when I need to have him entertained so I could go to the washroom or answer the phone. We have the Tiny Love Symphony-In-Motion Mobile and the Gymini. Outside of that, we don't really have any "toys" yet except for a few stuffed animals which he is more or less interested in. Again, good grandparent things to ask for later on.

High Chair: We haven't bought one yet. Still doing my research on this one. Stroller: You may already have one. If not, there is a fantastic store in Roncesvalles Village called Macklem's. They have a ton of baby stuff but the most knowledgeable staff and best selection of baby strollers/car seats in the city.

Diaper Bags: Never had one of these. I have a little knapsack that works way better than one of these shoulder strap bags and can hold a ton more if I need to. Diaper Pail: We have a Safety 1st one not the Diaper Genie. The Diaper Genie is a little more $$ and takes special bags with the Safety 1st one we just use long Kitchen Catchers.

Change Table: You might already have one, but just in case - here's a suggestion. We just bought a chest of drawers from IKEA painted it up and bought a change pad for the top. Once they get really active, you end up changing them on the floor and besides. Also when your done with diapers you just remove the change pad and Bob's your uncle.

Other little tidbits - not necessarily product related but that might help make your first few weeks a bit easier:

1. Change your voice mail message to say, we can't come to the phone but our little one is all good. Then turn off your ringers and check messages once or twice a day.
2. Have your husband be the master scheduler for visitors. When they do come and they ask can they bring anything - say sure breakfast, lunch or dinner.
3. Don't let the nurses scare you about breastfeeding. Yes, it is tough starting out, but at the end of the day its all about healthy mom, healthy baby.
4. Keep laughing and sleep as much as you can. Well, this is a start of the new knowledge we've amassed in 4 short months.

I hope this helps. Call my anytime if you have any questions or want to know more about anything. I'm only happy to help. And of course, as Benjamin grows we'll learn more. :) At the end of the day, the most important thing we've figured out is all your little person needs is love, sweet love. And I know you and your husband have that to give him/her in spades. Congratulations my dear. Can't wait to hear your news... Take Care Sweetie and Enjoy the Ride! It's Amazing!!!! Deb