Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Just say you're sorry

He pushed her. I didn't even see it. I was trying to get ready for work. But I heard PL bring Ben up body and bones, kicking and screaming and sit him on his bed for some "thinking-time".

"Stay in here until you are ready to say you are sorry to Frances," PL explained calmly over Ben’s shrieks and shut the door.

For the next 30 minutes, every time Ben would come out and refuse to say he was sorry, PL put him back in. And every time PL put him in there were more kicks and more screams. This must have happened 7 or 8 times. Towards the end of it, PL was holding the doorknob from the outside and Ben was pulling it from the inside. “Let me out! Let me out!” he bawled.

“Are you ready to say you’re sorry?” PL shouted over him.

“NO!”

“Then stay in there.”

A 3-year old’s will is something else. Funny, everyone warned us about pre-schooler tantrums. But that doesn't seen to make it any easier when your kid has one.

Now, Ben is no stranger to tantrums. He's pretty good at them actually. He has the whole rhythmic foot-stomping, shouting, repetitive messaging down (e.g. "NO NO NO" or "More juice polease, More juice please, More juice PLEEEASE). And this morning, he had all parts of the performance going. Not letting up for a second. It's enough to send you to the mental.

Trying to get this kid to say a simple “I’m Sorry” was like trying to get him to try broccoli or even a chicken nugget. Impossible.

“I can’t. I forgot how to say it,” he whined. Same for broccoli “I can’t. I forgot how to open my mouth.”

While this was happening, I put Frances on the bathroom floor, gave her an empty toilet paper roll and showered with the door open (again).

I felt a bit guilty that I wasn’t the stay-at-home mom handling this. But at the same time was relieved PL was dealing with it. Should I be in there trying to reason with Ben? Supporting PL? Holding the doorknob?....Nawh.

Finally, just as I was heading out the door, Ben came around the corner and hugged Frances who likely had forgot about the whole thing. Hell, she probably forgot about it the second it happened.


“I’m sorry,” he whispered, his eyes full of tears, his little lips trembling. His face was honest, sweet and sorry.

I melted. All’s forgiven, my doll. All's forgiven.

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